PEOPLE vs. MANUEL BAGOS

PEOPLE vs. MANUEL BAGOS
G.R. No. 177152, January 6, 2010

Leonardo-De Castro, J.:

Facts: Manuel Bagos was charged with the crime of rape committed on or about the month of May, 1998 along the river bank of Baling-caguing River, Mabini, Pangasinan against AAA (real name of the victim was withheld by the court in its decision), a 10 year old minor while bathing in the river by grabbing and pulling her to sit in his in his lap, thereafter removed her panty and his pants, inserted his penis to her vagina and have carnal knowledge with her. Accused denied the allegation and stated that the victim’s family accused him of raping [AAA] due to a family misunderstanding. On December 15, 1999, the RTC rendered a decision finding the accused guilty of the crime he was charged for. The CA upheld the decision of the RTC and added an award for exemplary damages. From the CA, the case was elevated to the SC upon filing of the accused-appelant of a notice of appeal on January 8, 2007. On his appeal, accused-appellant contends that the testimony of [AAA] is incredible, unconvincing and inconsistent with human nature. He particularly points out the part of her testimony where accused-appellant allegedly pulled her panty down to her knees, removed his pants while standing, made her sit on his lap while in the water and inserted his penis into her vagina. On appeal, accused-appellant claims that this is incredulous, considering that he had a slight physical defect on his leg and could not have inserted his penis into AAA’s vagina with ease and without ripping her panty if the same had been pulled down only to AAA’s knees. According to accused-appellant, that AAA did not shout for help during the incident was likewise contrary to common experience.

Issue: Whether or not the court erred in convicting the accused-appellant of the crime charged despite the failure of the prosecution to prove his guilt beyond reasonable doubt.

Held:
1. Credibility of the victim’s testimony.

When the issue is one of credibility of witnesses, appellate courts will generally not disturb the finding of the trial court unless it has plainly overlooked certain facts of substance and value that, if considered, might affect the result of the case. This is so because the trial court is in a better position to decide the question, having heard the witnesses and observed their deportment and manner of testifying during the trial.

2. Failure of the victim to shout for help.

This Court has noted in several cases that minors could be easily intimidated and cowed into silence even by the mildest threat against their lives. Be that as it may, the absence of struggle or an outcry from the victim is immaterial to the rape of a child below 12 years of age. The law presumes that such a victim, on account of her tender age, does not and cannot have a will of her own.

Courts usually give greater weight to the testimony of a girl who is a victim of sexual assault, especially a minor, as in this case, because no woman would be willing to undergo a public trial and put up with the shame, humiliation and dishonor of exposing her own degradation were it not to condemn an injustice and have the offender apprehended and punished. The crime of rape is essentially one committed in secrecy, hence it is usually only the victim who can testify with regard to the fact of forced coitus. As a result, conviction may be based solely on the plausible testimony of the private complainant.

I FEEL THE EARTH MOVED!

At about 1:30 in the afternoon today, an earthquake happened in Bacoor, Cavite. I was listening to the call that I was auditing when my officemate stood up from her chair and said “I am little dizzy.” I looked at her and I felt dizzy myself. The intensity is too strong to pass it up as a mere dizziness. We then realize that the earth is moving. Our office is located at the fifth floor. The movement can be felt anywhere from the floor to the ceiling. I felt numb and kept silent. I dare not move a muscle thinking that if I do I might intensify the earth’s movement. It was scary!

After the earthquake subsided I came to thinking what one ought to do during an earthquake. Your actions would depend on where you are when the earthquake happens. You could be indoor or outdoor if that happens. Then I realized that if it happens, regardless of where you are, you are supposed to keep your wit at all times. Presence of mind is the most important defense that you’ll have in case of natural disasters and not for earthquakes alone.

Here is some of what I should do if an earthquake happens in my house, workplace or just outside of my comfort zone.

1. Don’t panic!

2. Fall down to the ground. Cover yourself under a strong table, chair or any pieces of furniture made of strong materials.

3. Cover your head and face with your arms and squat or bend down in one corner of the edifice.
4. Stay away from things that could break or fall in your head like lighting fixtures, windows and walls.
5. Diminish your movement until the quaking has stopped.

6. Say a little prayer or whistle a happy song. It helps ease your nervousness.

7. Do not use the elevator when exiting from the building.

Earthquake can happen any time. Prepare yourself for the worst when it happens. Courage is undermined when you are unprepared.

HEARTBROKEN OVER A FOUNTAIN PEN

When I entered law school at the young age of twenty, I did not know that lawyers or law students are supposed to use a fountain pen. What is it? How does it differ from the usual Pilot sign pen that I use in my pre-law course? Needless to say, I am clueless as to how a fountain pen looks like. Good thing that I am not the only person in the class who was clueless about what a fountain pen is. I asked some of my classmates who were able to buy a set of fountain pen already of how much does it cost. They told me that the cheapest fountain pen they can find in bookstores cost more or less 300 Philippine pesos.

I am just a professional student who solely depends on financial support from my parents. I have limited budget for miscellaneous expenses including fountain pen. If I tell my parents how much a fountain pen cost, they would tell me to go for a Pilot sign pen instead.

I saved up a portion of my allowance daily so I can buy my own fountain pen before our Midterms in school. When I had enough savings, my classmate and I went to National Bookstore located in Recto corner Morayta Street in Manila to buy our first set of fountain pen. I picked a white fountain pen with gold rings on its body and on the lid of its cap. It was my priceless possession at that time.



I don’t remove it from its crystal box when I am not using it. I used it daily in taking notes from class. Fountain pen is a little harder to write because it has a big and round body unlike my old Pilot sign pen. When you write, it is supposed to glide on a smooth paper otherwise the ink will blot which will make your paper messy and dotty.

One day, I left my fountain pen in its box in my study table at home. When I came home from school, I immediately looked for it. It was gone! I remember to have left it just beside my lamp in the study table. I asked everyone in the house if they happen to see my fountain pen. Nobody knew where my fountain pen went. I am worried sick because I really love that pen. I always thought that it would live on to see me through until I graduate from college of law and become a full pledged lawyer. I was about to cry when my little sister came to my side and told me “Ate, I brought your fountain pen in school. It was taken by my classmate and he does not want to return it to me. ” I shouted and scolded her for taking my fountain pen without my permission. The following day, I went to her school and looked for the boy who took my fountain pen. The boy could not produce the fountain pen because he traded it for a toy with his playmate. My heart sunk in despair. There is no way that I can get my fountain pen back. I was really furious with anger against my little sister. I cried all day. I missed my class in school because I was so upset to even dress up and go to school.

As days and years went by, I survived the loss of my first fountain pen. I bought a new set of Parker fountain pen in three colors, that is, blue, brown and black to replace the white one that I previously had. I have forgotten my lost fountain pen. Now, I can only remember how I was heartbroken by a fountain pen and it makes me laugh every time I think of it.

ENGAGEMENT RING: TWO OR THREE MONTHS SALARY RULE APPLIES?

As I was researching for a work-related project, I chanced upon this ‘three months salary rule.” I thought it is the same thing from the three-month rule that I encountered for the first time in a local movie starring Bea Alonzo and John Lloyd Cruz. When I continued reading, I realized that it is different from the three-month rule that I know of.

The three-month rule that the article was talking about involves buying of engagement rings. It is said that if you will propose marriage to your girlfriend, make sure that you are prepared to give her an engagement ring worth two or three months of your salary.

When considering buying an engagement ring, it is difficult to be practical, for the reason that an engagement ring is a representation of love and it is so intricate to put a value to a feeling that is invaluable. Some people believe that a ring mirrors your love and commitment. Hence, the bigger the diamond, the deeper must be your love. Usually the rule of thumb is that the engagement ring should cost around two to three month’s of your salary so it would naturally depend on how much you earn when deciding to purchase one.

Now, what is my take on the three months rule on purchasing an engagement ring? I believe that the rule is a fairy tale. I admit that there is specific set of amount or percentage on how much one should spend on an engagement ring. This decision varies from individual to individual. Somehow, like any huge purchases that you may have had, you begin with establishing a budget first before you begin to start looking. Once your budget is set and you have several options available which are within the boundaries of your established budget you will finally be able to make a wise decision on which ring is right for you and your significant other. Your ultimate goal is to make sure that the ring you purchased is just within your means and living standards.

Whatever engagement ring you prefer will always be a stunning symbol of your affection for each other, and a constant memento of a very special day. So never mind how much you spend on it, it’s your love that will always be priceless.

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PEN AND INK

Went to the store to buy me a pen
The pen wouldn't write so I traded for a hen
The hen wouldn't lay so I traded for a ray
The ray wouldn't shine so I traded for a vine
The vine wouldn't swing so I traded for a ring
The ring wouldn't fit so I traded for a hit
The hit wouldn't run so I traded for a gun
The gun wouldn't shoot so I traded for a flute
The flute wouldn't blow so I traded for a hoe
The hoe wouldn't heave like holes in a sieve
Like folds in a sleeve and I think it's time to leave
So don't underestimate the power of the pen
Because the power of the mind translates into the pen
And if the power of the pen comes from w/in
Like the power of the mind that makes you think
Just think will this pen ever run out of ink?
The pen kept gliding on a piece of paper
The hand was guiding it ''cause sooner or later
Thoughts would emerge every time I get
the urge to write on a pad all the thoughts I ever had
We write the right rhymes so don't try to bite mine
In spite of this you still write to spite
We write the songs that make people sing along
You write for a fee and make a lot of enemies
You dig for the dirt get cash for the trash
How much would it cost for you to kiss my ass?
Because the pen is mightier than the sword
Heavens to Betsy, oh, my Lord!
If you believe, you shall receive
And if you deceive, we will besiege
Because the power of the mind translates
into the pen And if the power of the pen comes from within
Like the power of the mind that makes you think
Just think, will this pen ever run out of ink?
Yeah, use a pencil.

Francis Magalona
1964-2009

I chanced upon this lyric when I was surfing the internet in the office. I was doing nothing and the internet is my favorite past time these days. I thought it was a poem written by someone. It caught my attention and I read through it. At the end of the lyrics, I found the name of the author. It says Francis M. Confusion registered on my face. Am I reading what I think it is? The poem is written by Francis M? I copied the first stanza of the poem and pasted it in the Google search bar and hit enter. The search gave me song lyric hits. I opened the first hit and found that it was in fact a lyric of a song originally created by the late Filipino rapper Francis Magalona. My jaw dropped in amazement. Such a wonderful lyric was written by a Filipino rapper. It was a very powerful lyric and the display of creativity is apparent in its construction. Francis Magalona is a good lyricist and poet. It is just sad that he went away early in his life. There might have been beautiful words put into music by such a wonderful and creative working mind.

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INTERNET HACKERS ATTACK!

I was surprised to have received a call from a friend who is living in Cagayan de Oro one morning. I thought that she just missed me and decided to give a ring that morning. Lo and behold! The purpose of the call was far different from what I expected. The conversation went on like this.

Caller: “Grazee, where are you right now?”
Me: “I am on my way to the hospital because my mother is getting her eye operation today. Why?”

Caller: “Oh well, I and some members of the forum (the one that I am moderating), received an email from you just this morning informing us that you are in London and you were asking money because you were mugged and stuck in the airport or something.” There is a thread created in the forum just for that. Do you have access to the internet right now so you could check and reply on the thread?
Me: How can that be? I just got off from work and I never been out of the country yet. I wont have access to the internet until after lunch.

Caller: I believe your yahoo mail has been hacked and all your contacts were sent an email. Do you have a different email address where I can send you the letter sent to us?
Me. I do. Can you send me the email to my alternative email address? I gave my other email address.

Caller: Okay. I will reply to the thread created in the forum for this issue and tell them that you don’t know anything about it.
Me: Thanks Ate. I would really appreciate it.

When I got home, I immediately checked my email account. Surprise! I can not login. It says “account has been locked for 24 hours because it has been compromised.) I logged in to my alternative email address and found the email forwarded to me by my friend. The email is copied below.

“Hope you get this on time. Sorry i did not inform you about my sudden trip to Kent Dover UK for a program. I am presently stranded here and urgently require your kind favor soon. I hope you come to my aid. Last night, I got mugged at gun point on my way to the hotel where i lodged. They went away with all have got including my wallet where i have all my cash and credit card and also my cell phone. I wasn't injured because I quickly complied.

My traveling documents are been apprehended by the hotel management because of my inability to pay bills. I reported to the police and they only asked me to write a statement about the incident and later referred me to the embassy. I contacted our embassy here but they are not responding effectively to the matter. I am confused and so full of panic right now. For now, I do not have a phone where I can be reached. All i have got here is my mail. I also have limited access to the computer. Please I need you to kindly loan me about (1,820 Pounds) to sort-out my hotel bills and other expenses incurred here and get back home soon as i do not feel safe here anymore. I Promise to refund your money immediately i return home. I will explain full details to you when i get back. I will appreciate any amount you can quickly arrange and send to me via Western Union or Money Gram with the details below.

Receivers Names: (Name withheld for security reasons)
Receivers Address/location: 19 New Dover Road , Canterbury
Dover Kent,CT1 3AH, United kingdom

Write to me the full details of the transfer or scanned copy of the transfer receipt so that i can receive over here quickly. Let me know if you can be of any help soon because you are the only person i can reach at this moment and the next flight back home departs in about few hours.
Get back to me ASAP.

Kind Regards

Grazee”


My jaw dropped in desperation. I logged in to the forum that I am moderating and found out that that the members were worried about me and concerned if the email was sent by me or just a scam. My account was temporarily suspended by the Administrator so it won’t be hacked and damaged by the hacker until I called the Admin and gave an alternative email address to link up my account to. When I called on the Administrator of the forum to explain my side, I was not able to control myself from crying. Paul pacified me and told me to reset all my logins and passwords concerning my online bank accounts including Paypal which the hacker might get hold of and withdraw funds from them. Before I accomplish anything regarding my login and passwords, I posted a reply in the forum which is worded exactly like this.

“Hello Everyone,

I am sorry for the late posts that I am making for this bruhahaha. I just received a call from Daisy early this morning informing me that someone used my email account to send emails to members of the forum asking them to send me money.

First of all, I am not in the UK as of this moment. I just got home from the hospital because my mom has had an eye operation and I brought money to pay for the hospital bills. I received Daisy’s call on my way to the hospital after I got off from my work. When I logged in today to check my emails in yahoo, I can no longer access it. The error message said that “my account has been compromised.” Yahoo locked my account and I can only access it after 24 hours and probably after changing my password and verifying and/or answering some security questions.

The hacker got my real name and is using it to solicit money from members of the forum. I really don’t know why the hacker was able to get hold of your email addresses. I have only been in contact with a few members who became good friends of mine in and out of the forum. I am not really a technically knowledgeable person so I don’t know that my account has been hacked until I was informed through text message by Daisy and some friends of mine who were non-members of the forum that someone is using my identity to solicit money from them.

For this reason, I am coming forward to warn everyone that I am not the person who is asking you money. I don’t need financial help from anyone as of this time. If I do, I would course through my request to Paul first before I will send an email to any one of you. My father would beat me to death if I ask for someone’s help, especially if it concerns money, without asking him first. I am a member of the forum in good standing. I have never taken advantage of anyone from this forum and I don’t intend to do so in the future.

Now, my problem is how to secure my email account should I recover it. The hacker most probably have read my emails and got hold of my login and passwords to my online bank accounts including my Paypal account. This is a nightmare for me and I don’t know what to do.

Again, I am really sorry if I caused you trouble and anxiety. Thank you and God bless you all.”

Has anyone experienced the same problem with your email account being hacked by someone? It is so disappointing that your security is breached without you even knowing it, until your friends tell you about it. Some of these hackers get your email addresses from social networking sites that you might be a member of. I am a member of Facebook, Friendster, Myspace and some other forums and online networks. It never occurred to me that I could be a victim of an identity theft in the internet. It is unbelievable how these low-life people could use your account to defraud others. What if the people she was able to send an email responded to her plea of sending her money? She could have enriched herself to my expense! Grrrr…….

Now, what did I learn from this sad event in my life? I should create a bogus email address to link up with my social networking sites, change my passwords regularly, never store sensitive information in your email account and maintain several email accounts as your backup email should one been hacked. I hope you get to learn from my experience and share your learning to others.

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NATIONAL HISTORICAL INSTITUTE VERSUS ARNEL PINEDA

The controversy arose from the wrongful rendition of Journey’s front man, Arnel Pineda, of the Philippine National Anthem during the fight of Manny Pacquiao against Joshua Clottey at the Cowboys Stadium in Arlington , Texas on March 13, 2010. The spokesperson of the NHI claimed that Arnel Pineda sung the national anthem differently from the established beat and sound that it’s supposed to have been sung. Some artists who previously sung the same song in some of the previous fights of Manny Pacquiao came to Arnel Pineda’s defense. They said that it was not their intention to rewrite the rhythm and sound of the national anthem. What is important is that they sung it straight from their heart and with conviction.

As an ordinary citizen, I would say that NHI was just over reacting on the issue. When we were in school I don’t remember singing the national anthem in a marching beat. It was usually melancholic and slow. I agree with some of the stars that it is not how you sing it but what you felt when you were singing it. If it is their concern that the national anthem be sung based on its original beat and hymn, they should have sent someone who is trained to do that to sing in the fight. They give utmost importance to the correct execution of the song but they failed to do their part in doing so. This is just a media publicity for the NHI which does not reflect very well on the agency.

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CONTAINER VAN AND PUV COLLISION IN BACOOR, CAVITE

Earlier this morning, on my way home from work, I witnessed the collision of a container van to a passenger jeepney along Aguinaldo Highway just in front of SM City Bacoor. It created a huge and long early morning traffic. The van hit the jeepney on its side near its tail. Vehicles going to Manila were stuck in traffic. The van almost occupied three-fourths of the street giving little access for motorists. The driver is suspected to have been drunk while driving. The jeepney has no passengers yet because it just came out of the garage. I was able to take some pictures using my mobile phone when the bus that I was on board passed on the right side of the van.







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RUFFA AND KRIS's RECONCILIATION - ANOTHER SOAP OPERA?

The two well-known actresses and TV personalities, Kris Aquino and Ruffa Gutierrez, reconciled publicly on TV following their disputes originating from last week’s episode of the TV show “The Buzz.” Before today’s episode of the same show, Kris Aquino already released a public apology statement to Ruffa and her family for causing distress and pain. Ruffa later issued a statement accepting the apology of Kris Aquino and apologized to the latter as well for over-reacting.

What is my reaction to this kind of hullabaloo between two pretty actresses? This is a well-staged publicity for both of them.

They claim to have known each other and have been friends for 23 years; at least Kris said that in one of her interviews after that TV spectacle was aired on national television. If they were really friends, they should know when is the other person joking or serious about something. As I’ve watched the verbal exchanges that they had in the show, I can tell that Kris was only being playful and teasing Ruffa on the set. She might have exaggerated the teasing a bit which probably infuriated Ruffa, as seen from her facial expressions.

Oh well, this non-sense could have died after the taping if not for the call received by Ruffa from her mother. Of course Annabel Rama can not help herself from scrubbing in the issue, making it worst than it’s supposed to be. She called on the people not to vote on Kris’s brother, Nonoy Aquino, who is seeking the presidential post in the coming national election.

What do they get from this TV manipulation? It gave them an extra media exposure for Ruffa and another crying-on-TV episode for Kris. What do you think?

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A TALE OF A WANDERER IN BORACAY ISLAND

My friend and I decided to go to Boracay. We booked our flight via SEAIR sometime in December 2009 for our February 24-26 trip. A day before our trip, I went to Robinson’s Galleria in Ermita, Manila to buy new sets of bathing suit. I bought two pairs in addition to the two pairs I have at home. My mother bought me a traveling bag which could carry small pieces of clothes for my three day trip.

A day before the trip, I bought personal things like shampoo, conditioner, toothpaste, and sun block cream. I already filed my vacation leave a day earlier so I can spend a day packing my things into my bag. On the day of the trip, I woke up early and double checked the things that I packed the other day. When I was already satisfied, I hit the shower and change to my sleeveless top and green walking shorts and slipped on my sandals. I bid my mother goodbye and headed to the door.

I am already late for my pre-departure appointment with my best friend Allan. We’re supposed to have lunch before we check in to the airport. Before I boarded the bus to the airport, I went to a nearby internet café and printed my e-ticket. After which, I boarded the bus and alighted in Coastal Mall. From there I boarded a taxi to bring me to the old domestic airport where SEAIR flies. It was past one in the afternoon when I reached the gate of the airport. I am not worried because our flight is at three in the afternoon. I’ve got plenty of time to check in and wait for the passengers to be called. However, Allan who decided to check in ahead of me kept on bothering me by texting me where I was.

In the terminal’s waiting lounge, Allan met a young Japanese, Shohei, who is also going to Boracay. However, his flight was delayed so he spent his time chatting with us.



During this time, I was a bit upset because I think that we were too early when we checked in. We could have had our lunch outside of the terminal had he not checked in ahead of time. By three in the afternoon, we boarded the plane. We left Shohei in the terminal and told him that we will look for him in Boracay before it gets dark. Needless to say, we were both hungry when we boarded the plane.

He seated near the window and I seated near the aisle. My stomach complained because I had brunch at home and because I was upset with Allan my stomach was already upset. At this point in time I wished that I put some biscuits in my carry on bag so I have something to munch inside the plane. I endured the hunger until we arrived in Caticlan airport.

From the airport we were picked up by a van courtesy of the hotel where we will stay at in Boracay. We boarded the van and were taken to Jetty Port to board a motorized boat that will bring us to Cagban Port. From Cagban Port, another van serviced us and brought us to the hotel. We stayed in Boracay Courtyard in Station II. We got out hotel key and proceeded to our room. We unpacked our things and headed out.

I admired the beach and the pearly white sand when I stepped out of the hotel and into the beach. We walked to find a place where we can have our dinner. At last, we find a cheap place and ate tocilog, longsilog and la paz batchoy. By now, we felt relieved from hunger. We strolled in the beach.

While walking, we saw a familiar face in the crowd. It was Shohei! We called him and he joined us for a walk in the shore. We observed the activities that were happening around us. There was fire dancing in almost every corner of Station 2. The buffet tables were set and the crews were inviting visitors to come and eat. Since we already ate, we looked for a vacant table and chairs and sat there. Alan ordered beers and tacos. I had a beer that night and the two men had a bucket of beers for themselves. I felt drunk already so I called it a night and went back to our hotel. I checked my mails and updated my Facebook account. I hit the shower and changed clothes before I went to bed. After two hours, Allan came in. He slept soundly, snoring so loudly on the other bed. I had a hard time sleeping because he snored loud. After a while, I fell asleep.

We woke up at around five in the morning and prepared ourselves for breakfast in the other hotel. We had a sumptuous breakfast in La Carmela Hotel. We had bacon, fried rice, corned beef, eggs, coffee, and juice. I ate plenty to last until late lunch. After breakfast, we went back to our hotel room. Allan summoned a masseuse and had a massage in our hotel room. After the massage he slept. Meanwhile, I checked my mails and FB. I waited for Shohei to show up so I have someone to accompany me when I swim.

I swam in the beach together with Shohei. I have to bribe Shohei to accompany me in the waters and to take my pictures. Allan is in the shore calling and texting his clients. What a waste of time and opportunity to swim! Anyhow, Shohei and I had a great time swimming. He took some of my pictures while I was in the water.



By four in the afternoon, we left the beach and headed to our hotel room. I hit the shower and rest for a while before we went out and had dinner. While looking for a place to eat dinner, I arranged an ATV activity for the next day before we come back to Manila. I had a deal for ATV ride at Php400 and I am the only one going to do it the following morning.

We had our dinner near the beach. After eating, both men had a drink. Since I was tired swimming, I went back to our hotel room early. I hit the sack after checking my mails and uploading some of our pictures from my camera phone. I woke up early so we can have breakfast early in La Carmela Hotel. I have a scheduled ATV activity by seven in the morning. I need to eat fast and meet my guide.

My guide picked me up at past seven in the morning in the hotel for my ATV ride. We rode a tricycle and went to the place where ATV rides were. Upon reaching the place, I rode one of the ATV’s for a test drive and listened for my guide’s instructions. When I was ready to drive, the guide and I went for a ride. We traveled the uphill part of Boracay. The guide was very courteous to take my pictures in every angle in the hillside. We went to Mt. Luho and took some pictures at the top most part of the view of Boracay from afar. I rode the ATV for an hour. When I was done riding it, I rode a tricycle back to Station II.



Allan and I went out and bought some keep sakes and give aways for family and friends who are waiting for us in Manila. After my shopping, I decided to swim again before we pack our things and headed to the airport. I was in my bathing suit, anyway. So, I went to the beach and swam one last time. I spent an hour in the water and under the sun. When I felt tired of swimming, I went back to the hotel. I hit the shower and changed clothes.

I packed my things and prepared myself to leave the place. I made sure that I did not leave anything behind. When I was ready, Allan called the receptionist and informed her that we were ready to leave the place. We were picked up by one of the hotel’s staffs and brought to Cagban Port. We boarded a boat and brought us back to Jetty Port. From Jetty Port we were picked up by a van and were brought to Caticlan Airport. Our flight is at thirty minutes past three in the afternoon.

Upon check in, we were informed that we can board an earlier flight to Manila because the plane that recently landed has no passengers. We opted to take the earlier flight so we can be in Manila before lunch. We boarded the plane. I was seated near the window and Allan was seated near the window just in front of me. There were enough seats for us to be seated near the window of the plane. We landed in the domestic airport at quarter to twelve in the afternoon. Allan headed to Casino Filipino to meet his sister and I headed home in Cavite.

That was all about my Boracay trip. It was not much of a fun as I imagined it to be because my friend played a “kill joy” during our stay there. I will go back in Boracay someday soon but I will make sure that I will be accompanied by someone who is willing to do all the activities I wanted to experience in the island. I missed some of it and I vow to do those things the next time.

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LOVE IS A COMPROMISE

I have been in a relationship with several men for the past fifteen years. The longest relationship lasted for almost five years. We were already planning to get married. I thought that he’d be the one for me. He promised me that he will never leave me whatever happens. “Come what may”, he said. Later on, I have proven this to be wrong though. He fell out of love I guess. There is no way that I can win him back. He became emotionally detached to me. I have to confront him for this. He just said he does not love me the same way he felt for me four years ago. I was heartbroken. We parted ways and have never seen each other since then.

What I came to realize after this last failed relationship is that there is actually no blueprint to successful relationships. Love is negotiated in tender loving ways, where there is enough room for parties, what they would want and what they would need, what they could do and what their life would likely be. It is not business where in people negotiate to win. Love is when you are anxious about someone else’s circumstances as you are about your own.

Two years after the break up, I still think of him. I still have the “what if” feeling, regretful of the relationship. I am always thinking if I failed to make a compromise with him or if we did compromise, was I able to live up to the compromise agreement? Until now, tears fall in my eyes when I think of how we were when we’re together. It pains me to think that I have lost a good man. I secretly wish that he’d realize that he had lost a good woman, too and decides to come back to me. I am patiently waiting for his return and I don’t know how long it will take for him to find his way back to me.

One thing is certain when he comes back, I would know when to compromise for our love to flourish and endure all the hardships. I just hope that he will come back sooner than later. Until then, my love for him floats.

Are you willing to compromise in the name of love?

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YOUNGER FILIPINAS PREFER OLDER FOREIGNERS. WHY?

This is a reply to a discussion in a forum which I am currently moderating. The members were discussing why younger Filipinas prefer older foreigners. My reply to the discussion was a little late because I was busy with work and some things to do at home. Anyway, below was the reply that I posted in the forum.

Younger Filipinas prefer older foreigners because:

1. Financial Security. Older/retired foreigners have money coming from their retirement/pensions. It is wiser to marry or live with a man who has more mpney and financial stability.

2. Mortality rate. Older men die easily. These older foreigners are just waiting for their time to pass by. If they die, younger Filipinas could again remarry someone older or younger. They would go for older men to repeat the cycle or younger men to populate their species.

3. Company. Older foreigners have more time to stay in the house with their wives/girlfriends. They are more visible than younger foreigners because they don’t work most of the time. If the younger woman is the clingy type, she has her foreign husband/partner available to her anytime she wants to be cuddled.

4. Intelligence. Older foreigners are more knowledgeable and experienced a lot in life already. If the younger Filipina is eager to learn, she would choose an older foreigner in the belief that he can impart great knowledge to her about life and the world in general.

5. Procreation. Younger Filipinas who do not want to get pregnant will consider marrying an older foreigner because it would be harder for the foreigner to copulate if there is no Viagra available for him. I have a friend who is married to a foreigner 30 years her senior. They have sex once a month, and if she gets unlucky, there’ll be none at all. They don’t have children and she is still in her early 30s and they’ve been married for almost 10 years now.

6. Trust issues. Younger Filipinas would choose older foreigners because they are more trusting of their partners. They don’t usually scrutinize their partners of where and whom did they go out with. They don’t ask how the money was spent by their partners.

7. Generosity. Older foreigners are more generous of their money and time to younger Filipinas and her family. She can be a “bilmoko” (colloquial word for “bili mo ko” which has an English equivalent as “buy me this and that”) and the older foreigner is just happy to oblige. Showering her of material things like clothes, accessories and money are common among older foreigners to win their younger Filipina’s affection.

8. Father figure. They see older foreigners as a father figure. As a father figure, they expect that they will be treated with kindness as what fathers do to their daughters.

Of course, we can not discount the fact that some younger Filipinas marry older foreigners because of pure love and affection. Now, that is noble and uplifting to know that some can still give unconditional love to unsuspecting older foreigners.

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BOTO MO, iPATROL MO: AKO ANG SIMULA!

ABS-CBN will launch its campaign with the aim of encouraging Filipinos to play an active role in the upcoming 2010 Presidential Election. The campaign targets young Filipinos to proactively participate and initiate change as early as possible by registering to vote. The TV station encourages voters from here and abroad to report their respective concerns and observations regarding the election. Several voters booth were stationed in Metro Manila and in the provinces of Pampanga, Cebu and Davao .
So how does this campaign actually work? The volunteers who registered in the booth set up by ABS-CBN in different provinces will serve as their allies in delivering news to the people all over the Philippines on how the campaigns and the elections were conducted and held. They will report anomalies, pay offs and other illegal activities of people who are seeking elective positions. It is geared to implement the election code on a national level through the aid of young Filipinos via internet and mobile technology, cable TV, and radio services.

It is a long shot for this multi-media conglomerate to aim for fair and peaceful election but who can tell if it is going to be successful or not. The end result will be revealed on May 11, 2010 when the votes are cast and the winners are proclaimed. Until then, we hope that this endeavor could at least alleviate the election-related crimes and occurrences.

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MAGUINDANAO MASSACRE – THE KILLING FIELDS

The country was stunned and in grief after the news breaks the brutal death of several people including the wife of Buluan Vice Mayor Ismael Mangundadatu, his sister and some relatives, who will file on his behalf his Certificate of Candidacy for Governor of Maguindanao province. They were accompanied by press people and lawyers in a convoy to Shariff Aguak town, where the election office of the province is located when a group of about 100 armed men abducted them. They were killed and some were buried alive along with their vehicles in a land owned by the Ampatuan clan.

The killings are the first major election-related violence in the May 2010 elections, which are still several months away. Most of the victims are women. Mangundadatu believes that the killings were politically motivated. Mangundadatu and Ampatuan are rival political clans in Maguindanao. Mangundadatu is going against the older Ampatuan for the gubernatorial posts of the province. Seeing him as a threat to the political posts that he wants to hold, the older Ampatuan ordered for the liquidation of the people who will file for Mangundadatu’s Certificate of Candidacy.

After seeing the news on television and reading the accounts of the deaths in newspapers, I come to thinking that there is really no good politics. Politics will always be dirty as long as there are people who want to stay in power so much that they would walk the extra mile of liquidating their opponents. Philippine politics is a shame!

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SINGLE BLESSEDNESS

I wonder if I am meant to be with someone I can share the rest of my life with. I kept myself busy with paper works. I forgot to date even though someone asks me to. I become oblivious of the fact that I desperately need someone to hold hands with. I can’t remember the last time I kissed or have been kissed. My parents constantly urge me to get married. How can I tell them that my chance of getting married is hanging at the edge of a cliff?

Later I got to thinking about relationships. There are those that open you up to something new and exotic, those that are old and familiar, and those that bring up lots of questions, those that bring you somewhere unexpected, those that bring you far from where you started, and those that bring you back. But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love, well, that’s just fabulous.

However, part of me has always felt that life has no real meaning until you get to share it with somebody. Maybe that’s what I’m afraid of: my life finally taking meaning or suddenly becoming void of it. Maybe I’ll share my life with somebody… maybe not. But the truth is when I think back of my loneliest moments, there was usually somebody sitting there next to me.

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UNREQUITED LOVE

I’ve found almost everything ever written about love to be true. Shakespeare once said “Journeys end in lovers meeting, every wise man’s son doth know.” What an extraordinary thought. Personally, I have not experienced anything remotely close to that, but I am more than willing to believe Shakespeare had. I suppose I think about love more than anyone really should. I am constantly amazed by its sheer power to alter and define our lives. It was Shakespeare who also said “love is blind” from his play The Merchant of Venice. Now that is something I know to be true. For some quite inexplicably, love fades; for others love is simply lost. But then of course love can also be found, even if just for the night or a brief moment. And then, there’s another kind of love: the cruelest kind, the one that almost kills its victims. It’s called unrequited love. Of that kind of love I am an expert.

I am a victim of the one sided affair. I am the cursed of the loved ones. I am the unloved one, the walking wounded. The handicapped without the advantage of a great parking space! I have willingly loved that man for over six miserable years! The absolute worst years of my life! The worst Christmas’, the worst Birthday’s, New Years Eve’s brought in by tears. These years that I have been in love have been the darkest days of my life. All because I’ve been cursed by being in love with a man who does not and will not love me back. Oh God, just the thought of him! Heart pounding! Throat thickening! Absolutely can’t swallow! All the usual symptoms, can you imagine that?

I have been waiting for him to come back to me and love me again assuming that he did love me. I have known him when I was young. I thought that I had the best time of my life with him merely because I opened myself to the possibility of a long term relationship for the first time. I allowed myself to dream that we’ll be living and building a family together. Well, he left without saying goodbye and we lost communication. It was a short-lived romance after all but it consumed almost of my adult years. I have been into serious relationships after him but my heart longs for someone from the past. I can never give myself fully to any one because he still has my heart. Then one day he found me through a social networking. He’s been in my network of friends but he never shows interest on me. I felt that he is just near but yet so far away. At last! He decided to write me. I was happy that he took notice of me. I can’t help myself and ask him why he left so suddenly. I was expecting that he would redeem himself by giving me an explanation which however worst or whimsical it may be I will most probably believe anyhow but nothing prepared me to receive a response so rudely delivered. No explanation was made. He just gave me a dismissive statement. My heart shrunk into disbelief of how rude he has become. I realized I don’t know him at all. He is someone I just can’t - someone who self-evidently can’t be mine. I’ve opened Pandora’s box, and there was trouble inside. I was shaken. I cried for a while because I was hurt. I see the dream I built dismounts and crumbles from the pedestal I put it in.

In the nutshell, I understand feeling as small and as insignificant as humanly possible and how it can actually ache in places you didn’t know you had inside you. And it doesn’t matter how many new haircuts you get, or diets you try, or gyms you join, or how many glasses of liquor you drink with your girlfriends… you still go to bed every night going over every detail and wonder what you did wrong or how you could have misunderstood. And how in the hell for that brief moment you could think that you were that happy. Sometimes you can even convince yourself that he’ll see the light and show up at your door because you’re hoping you’re wrong. And every time he does something that tells you he’s no good, you ignore it. And every time he comes through and surprises you, he wins you over, and you lose that argument with yourself, that he’s not for you. After all that, however long all that may be, you’ll go somewhere new. You’ll meet people who make you feel worthwhile again. Little pieces of your soul will finally come back. And all that fuzzy stuff, those years of your life that you wasted, that will eventually begin to fade. It gives you a sense of confidence, that despite being at the end of a rapidly fraying rope for as long as you can imagine, there is a sunshine at the end of the tunnel and that, there is no misery (no matter how miserable it may make you feel at that particular moment) that lasts forever! The demons that are caught up inside your head… the ones that are lurking in the corner, no matter how many people you are with, or how much fun you are “supposedly” having… just fade away!

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PLATONIC RELATIONSHIPS

Platonic relationship is a non-sexual, non-committal but affectionate relationship, especially in cases where one might easily assume otherwise. It is a deep, non-sexual friendship, not subject to gender pairings and not excluding close relatives.

This is the kind of relationship I share with my best friend Allan. We have known each other since 1992 and we stayed friends and remained to be in close contact until now. Some of our friends often wonder why we did not end up as lovers. We always tell them that our relationship transcends from simple friends to brothers and sisters. I don’t feel any sexual connection with him and so is he. There are no pretensions or inhibitions between us. I can practically take off my clothes in his presence and never feel insecure or conscious about how I look. With just a grin or a blink of an eye we already knew what the other mean and want to say. We practically read each other’s mind. We are one of a kind. We compliment each other. When I feel down due to a recent failed relationship, he is always there to remind me to pick myself up and move on. He is always there for me during difficult times. As we get older, we oftentimes argue. He barks on my very traditional and conservative ways. He makes fun of me.

I’ve read an article explaining the complexities of platonic relationships. Applying the principles of platonic relationship with the relationship I currently have with my best buddy Allan, I ended up enumerating the following conclusions.
1. Just because he befriends you, it does not mean he will pursue you emotionally.

Not every guy who befriends you has an ulterior motive. There is a reason why he befriended you, but don’t automatically assume that it’s because he wants to be emotionally involved with you in the future. With me and Allan, we became friends because we sit side by side in the classroom in College every time our last names are alphabetically arranged. We talk most of the time and make fun of each other. I appreciate his sense of humor which means that I laugh at his corny jokes most of the time.

2. Just because he is kind to you, it does not mean he is courting you.

There are people who are naturally sweet and kind. There are people who are innately good and no matter how wicked you seem they just find it easy to be kind to you. It’s not even close to courtship. Don’t put yourself through unnecessary stress trying to figure out if he’s courting you or not. If he is, you won’t have to guess, you’ll know and you’ll be very certain about it. With Allan, I am certain that he is not courting me and he does not plan to do so in the near future. We’re just comfortable with each other thereby eliminating any possibility of a romance. I can act as his girlfriend if I feel like being naughty sometimes. He hates me when I do but who cares, he knows me very well to interpret it differently.

3. Just because he talks to you a lot, he already loves you.

Chances are you make sense when he talks to you, or you’re very patient listening to his stories. Most probably, both of you connect in some level but why does it always have to be assumed to be romantic? Being intelligent, mature human beings, you need to accept that it’s nice to share a cup of coffee over a stimulating conversation, and that you don’t have to automatically put a romantic connotation to it. Relieve yourself of the pressure. It’s just coffee and a shared interest. Allan and I love to talk about anything under the sun. We reminisce our college day’s experiences. Oftentimes, we talk about our friends and how they are right now. We also talk about our lives, works and relationships. It would take us long hours before we get tired of talking. This is the most fun part of our friendship. We talk, sip coffee and have fun.

4. Just because your friend is cute, does not mean you already have a crush on him or love him already.

People always assume that just because your friend is “hot”, you desire him. It just only tells you one thing, that you have not been blind and that you can still appreciate God’s creation! However, there will always be weird things, crazy things, stupid things that will keep you from having a crush on him. First of all, you know his history with women, enough to judge what’s good for you. Second, don’t you just hate it when a guy is always so put together and who looks intelligent and neat? Third, you know how he manages his finances and how much he can spend for a date. Well, with my friend Allan, he is afraid of commitment, a very vain person and who has his wallet hidden under his skin. I can’t stand him looking at the mirror for long hours more than I do for myself. Vanity is his game and it drives me nuts most of the time. He is always well-put and I put up myself just fine. Of course, he gambles in the casino a lot and he has passion for signature clothes and expensive things. Although I am not intimidated by his presence, I feel that I am inadequate when we’re walking side by side. He is the drop-dead gorgeous and I am just a walking spinster. Argh!!!!!

5. Just because you hang out most of the time does not mean that you’d end up being girlfriend-boyfriend.

This is self-explanatory. There are plenty of reasons why things don’t always turn out that way. There is no proven formula for it. For all we know, the reason why he likes hanging out with you is because he likes getting vanity tips from you. He probably plans on being vain himself and he needs a mentor. With Allan, we usually hang out with each other to update ourselves with what happened to us for the past days. There is no big deal about it. It’s just the way we are. A little gossip spice up our lives.

6. Just because he asks you out for dinner or lunch, does not mean that he is into you.

A dinner with a guy friend does not necessarily equate to a date especially if you are paying for your share in the meal. There are three things to consider here: the place, the topic, and how the two of you actually planned to meet.

First is the place: if he agrees to meet you in a place closer to him, it just means that he is meeting someone else and you’ll be there as his stand-by date just in case his supposedly date does not arrive. If it was a real date, both of you would want real food from a really nice, cozy and fancy restaurant and/or place where you could really talk things through. Second is the topic: you would mostly talk about your feelings for each other and not about some news you just seen or heard on television and/or radio. You don’t talk about topics like showbiz gossips or office politics when you’re on a date. You would probably be talking about sensible, quite personal stuff. Third is how the date was planned: if it was a date, he would ask you three days in advance before the actual date to give you some time to prepare, and also to give you the notion that you are not just “filler” on his schedule. With Allan, our date is spontaneous and always out of schedule. He usually sends me messages if he wants us to meet. He sets up the meeting place and it’s usually in a place near courthouses where he usually is. He is a lawyer so he could have a hearing in the nearby courthouse in an hour or two. Typically, we’ll have lunch together and then he will go back to work and so do I. We usually split the cost of our meal. Sometimes, we go to Tagaytay to visit our favorite church and pray for our own intentions. Our conversation mostly revolves on work and friends.

I therefore conclude that platonic relationships do exist and they are never complicated; people just have tendencies to complicate them. Relationships founded on friendship tend to be the best and the longest lasting kind. Know your boundaries and know the risks, then proceed with caution.We are happy with how we turned out to be. Although he will leave me soon to seek greener pasture abroad, I know that I will always be his best friend and vice versa. I will always be eternally grateful for this opportunity and experience!

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THE PURSUIT OF THE BUTANDING (WHALE SHARK))

It was on the 9th of December 2008, my friends and I woke up early. We are scheduled to go to Donsol, Sorsogon to hunt for Butanding and to do wake boarding thereafter. It was our third day in Tabaco, Albay and we were fully booked for the day’s adventures.

We were fetched from the hotel at around 6:30 in the morning. We had our breakfast on the way to Legazpi. After eating, we’re off the road to Donsol, Sorsogon. We were all excited to reach the shore of Donsol to hunt for Butanding. After an hour drive, we reached Donsol and proceeded to the Donsol Butanding Interaction Center which is a branch of the Department of Tourism in charged with the preservation of Butanding.

At the Tourism Office, we were required to register and attend a brief orientation session prior to heading out to see the Whale Sharks. Likewise, we were required to pay the fee for: Boat Rental and Crew, Registration, and snorkeling equipment rental. The maximum number of registrants per boat is 7 people.

After a brief orientation period on the rules and guidelines, we are ready to head out to the open sea. Our group will be accompanied by a BIO (Butanding Interaction Officer) who will serve as our guide while we're out in the water, one Spotter, on the look-out for the Butanding, and two crew members to man the boat.

Our hearts are filled with excitement and anticipation when we boarded the boat. As we sailed away from the shore and into the open sea, we were praying that these gentle giants would finally show up. We were told by the BOI that they can not guarantee that we will see Butanding as of this time because the Butanding season has not yet begun although there were reported sightings of the sea creature already as early as November. We reached the open sea where the Butanding usually feed itself with planktons. Unfortunately, there is no sign of the gigantic sea creature anywhere.
We have been at sea for an hour. Expectations run high. We kept afloat for almost two hours. At last! The boat captain shouted to prepare to jump into the water. There was a Butanding spotted in the school of fish near our boat. Though slightly distorted by the motion of the bay’s waves, a massive yet graceful form draws near our suddenly tiny craft. Cheers abound as mask and fins are donned. In a few moments, our team will be swimming with the greatest fish of them all.
“Jump!” shouts the BOI accompanying us. We obliged and dived in. Moments later we were greeted by an unusually marked juvenile; perhaps it exceeds the length of our typical passenger bus and weighs more than six adult elephants.
I landed on the tail of the Butanding. One of us, landed on its face and another on its broad trunk. I was about a foot above the tail of the Butanding. I can feel the slimy water passing through my legs and feet. The rule that is, to maintain at least 3 meters distance from the head and body of the whale shark and 4 meters from the tail section was not followed because we directly landed on top of it when we jumped into the water. After what seems like minutes (in reality, mere seconds) the shark takes a nose dive and disappears, leaving us breathless in its wake.
I was panic-stricken which made me swallow at least a glass of salt water. The snorkeling equipment that I was wearing does not fit me right. It added to the discomfort that I felt when I jumped into the water. The diver held me and carried me near the boat.
Before we even climb aboard, another is sighted, then another. Each interaction is totally unique, an adventure in itself. We came back to the boat triumphant and exhilarated. After just two hours, our team clocks in three whale sharks and three interactions. So by 4pm, we were ready to head back to land. We officially opened the 2009 Butanding Season!

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